Relationships are a natural part of life and love, but finding the one that is perfect for you can seem overwhelming. It is always nice when a simple list exists to help us know where to at least get started. Below is a list to help you know how to find a relationship that will work in your life and hopefully lead to lasting love in the long-term.
- Know Yourself
It is impossible to find the right relationship if we do not know ourselves well. The right relationship always begins with self-work and getting to know yourself at the deepest levels. Getting to know ourselves is so important because if we do not know what we want, believe, or expect, we cannot find someone to offer that to us in a relationship. In addition, a relationship is not about completing us, but about helping us grow more secure in who we are in life. If we do not know who we are, no one can help us grow into something greater in the context of a relationship.
- Know Exactly Who You are Looking For
Almost as importantly as knowing yourself is knowing what you want in a relationship. While most people think of what they are looking for in terms of physical appearance, looks fade over time, so do not be so limiting. Spend time thinking about and possibly writing down what you want in a partner like kind, cares for animals, or similar interests and then be open to receiving that partner in whatever form that may take. As you think about the list, you are putting the intention out into the universe to allow it to return when the time is right.
- Put Yourself Out There
Finding a relationship requires getting out and meeting people. While internet dating is fun, if you are looking for something lasting then face to face is the way to go. No great relationship was formed vegging out on the couch alone as you binge watch television. Be willing to put yourself out into the world and be ready to meet your match around every corner. It may take a few days or a year, but be open to putting your best foot forward each and every day.
- Allow Them to Pursue You
While you may feel desperate for a relationship, never appear too desperate or willing for a potential partner. Men tend to like to do the chasing, but this is somewhat true for both genders. Make yourself known, but not too available by stopping by to say hello, mentioning you would like to hang out sometime, and then walking away to wait for an invitation. If you are too easy to access then all the mystery is removed and so is the fun in the chase. People should know you may be available, but you are far from available for just anyone. Think of it as if you are a child and want a toy that is just out of reach. It made that toy much more desirable and you worked harder to access it. If someone is not willing to put in effort to chase you for a little while, then they are not worth a relationship.
- Give People a Chance
Most people carry around a specific image of who they think would be the perfect partner, but it is important to let those who do not fit your ideal image have a chance. You may be surprised at who ends up being the one if you are open enough to give them the chance.
- Stop Wondering If You are Right for Them
If you are in a relationship or one is forming, just let things unfold naturally. There is no need to worry if you are right for the other person because you are already hitting it off. Each person must make their own decisions on if and when to make the relationship work.
Relationships are important to humans and finding the right one can be life altering. Take this list and start working on yourself and then go out into the world to find your match.
Seriously? This sounds like a generic self-help book! Relationships aren’t that simple, and suggesting we just ‘put ourselves out there’ ignores so many real-life complications.
*chuckles* Honestly, this sounds like a dating manual from another era. Give people chances? What if they’re actually terrible? Let’s not lower our standards for love!
*sigh* So now I’m supposed to play hard to get like it’s the ‘90s again? Next thing you know, they’ll suggest wearing shoulder pads and using dial-up internet to meet my soulmate!
The points made about knowing yourself and what you want in a partner are quite valid. It’s backed by psychological principles that emphasize self-awareness as crucial for healthy relationships.
“Stop wondering if you’re right for them”—great advice! Because who doesn’t love living life on the edge of complete uncertainty? Sounds thrilling!
“Know yourself and put yourself out there”—sounds easy enough! Maybe I’ll just start holding up signs at intersections: ‘Looking for love, apply within!’
This article is so refreshing! It’s a great reminder that self-discovery is the first step in finding love. I really appreciate the practical advice provided here!
While I agree with some aspects, the idea that people should chase each other is outdated. Shouldn’t relationships be about equality rather than games? This approach seems a bit counterproductive.